#this is why I like teaching teenagers. their combination of no judgment but a lot of taste means they know where to pay attention

[itspileofgoodthings]

people take Jane Austen for granted.

[mislamicpearl]

So maybe this will make you feel better - I'm a 29 year old woman, a math teacher, and I just became a Ninjago fan, like, a year ago!

I have two brothers and two sisters, but it wasn't my brothers who were into the show (not their kind of thing, one's more into DC heroes stuff and the other is into very obscure weird stuff), and anyway we were already in high school when Ninjago first started airing, so not really part of the age demographic for it. My little sisters, however, watched the show on TV and they got really into it. I, sorry to say, kind of dismissed the show entirely due to it being a Lego show (I used to say stuff like "Isn't this just basically Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, but Lego? Why do they have to be Legos??") but I don't think I honestly ever thought of it as a "boy's show". More like a kid's show without any real quality or substance.

The show first really caught my attention while my sisters were watching season 6 episodes and I saw that Cole was still a ghost (I'd been in the room when they'd first watched the episode where he turned into one), and I was shocked when they told me he'd never turned back. I was impressed that a kid's show had given one of the main characters such a consequence and actually stuck with it, rather than fixing the problem immediately or by the end of the season. It sounded surprisingly dark and angsty (and it made Cole my unofficial favorite ninja for awhile before I ever even watched the show from the beginning haha). I still never sat down to watch the show proper, but hearing my sisters talk about it I could see I'd probably been a bit too judgmental of how it looked (they absolutely LOVED Skybound and talked about it extensively, so I knew a lot about what happened in that season too and it also sounded fun [and I know Skybound is unpopular in the fandom but honestly screw that, I still think it's one of the best seasons!].)

Anyway I never ended up watching full episodes or anything, and after the movie came out (which my sisters and I watched in cinema together) my sisters kinda dropped the show because of a combination of not liking the new designs of the characters, changes to the story (or what they assumed were a lot of changes to the story to fit the movie), and our TV channel service not putting the show on anymore. They never forgot it though.

Cut to some years later, the younger of my sisters is in high school and the other one's in uni, and I've been teaching for several years, but all three of us are still as obsessed with cartoons and anime as ever, and we make a habit of binge-watching any new franchise or show that looks interesting. In March 2023 we watched Lego Monkie Kid season 4 and had to wait for the special to come out, and I guess it being a Lego show put my sisters back in the mood for Ninjago. They'd always talked about going back to it and watching it from the beginning, and continuing past Skybound where they'd left it.

I'll be honest, I kinda fell asleep through the first episode and that made me decide maybe the show just wasn't for me. I'd catch the odd episode here and there as my sisters continued their binge though, and I will say, personally, I liked the boy's vibes it gave in those early seasons (they reminded me a lot of Power Rangers, which one of my brothers loved when he was little; same kind of out-of-pocket goofiness, especially with the snakes ahaha). I got interested again in watching the show during season 3 (I knew Zane died at the end of that season and told my sisters to let me know when they reached that episode), and then from the first episode of season 4 onwards, the show had me; by now I was familiar with the characters, I loved the whole idea of the Tournament of Elements arc (reminded me of tournament arcs in anime), and then season 5 was even better, and Skybound was like, even better than that (my jaw literally DROPPED when Jay read the letter after his first wish saying his dad had died... again like, dang, I wasn't used to this kind of thing being in a KID'S show!)

After my sisters and I completed the whole show up to Crystalized (plus all the shorts and specials), I went back and watched the first two seasons again on my own and had a much better appreciation for them. Again I don't think I ever consciously thought of it as a "boy's show", but even if I had, that wouldn't have stopped me from watching it. I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with a show being more geared towards one gender over the other, or that a girl shouldn't enjoy a "boy's show" any more than a boy couldn't enjoy a "girl's show" (witness the era of the Bronies!). Or, for that matter, that an adult can't enjoy shows meant for kids. Do I feel a little embarrassment for being an adult and enjoying obsessing over a show like Ninjago? Well, yeah, I would be around certain people - I wouldn't really want my parallel teachers at school to know about it (though I did find out one of them is an anime fan like me!), but IF it was ever found out, I wouldn't be outright mortified or anything. I consider watching cartoons as my own quirky little personality trait that isn't necessary to mention in casual conversation, but that a person is welcome to discover on their own and make of it what they will.

As far as hiding it from family members goes, you can see I was blessed with siblings I'm very close to (my sisters both being almost a whole decade younger I practically raised them to be as into fiction as I am), but I did used to watch stuff in secret when it was just my brothers and I (oh my, the days when I used to sneak downstairs after bedtime with a pair of earphones to watch Sonic X episodes on YouTube on my dad's laptop in the dark!). As we got older though I stopped minding their teasing of my interests, especially after they developed fixations of their own (and also moved out of the house XD). If it's something that makes you happy and gives you harmless comfort, nothing should make you feel ashamed of enjoying it. Your family might think it's weird at first but they'll gradually accept it. And as for classmates, it's not impossible that at least one of them is secretly in love with Ninjago too!

Females of the Ninjago fandom, I have a couple of questions as a girl myself...

How did you discover the show? And how many people in your personal lives know that you're fans?

I don't mean to be discriminatory, but I feel that it's obvious that Ninjago, at least initially, was intended for boys. That too, little boys. Like kids aged about 6-12 or something.

But here, however, I've seen many girls (or women) into Ninjago. And I'm a fifteen year old girl who writes a lot of Ninjago fanfiction. But the thing is, in real life, nobody knows about my Ninjago obsession. (Well except for my best friend who's never even seen the show.)

And if someone from my family found out about my ao3 or tumblr account I will die of humiliation.

I started watching the show with my siblings, but they're not interested in it anymore. But I still am and they don't know that. Hell, they don't even know I was ever interested in it.

Today I was at home alone, so I managed to watch an episode of Ninjago successfully. Maybe someday I'll do it again.

Can anyone relate?

[big-wet-cas-eyes]

wings: day 3 of @starrynightdeancas 's 2k followers celebration ✨ (ao3)

when i saw the wings prompt, i didn't think i would end up writing meet cute au, but here we are (wc: ~2000)

Thursdays are Dean's favorite day to be at conferences. Usually, there's only a partial day of events, and some people skip it altogether. Once the conference is in full swing, he'll be busy bouncing from talks to lunches to happy hours to dinners with people he only sort of knows. But on Thursdays, he can breathe.

Conferences certainly aren't his favorite part of being a professor. He's kind of a homebody, so the travel and socializing is a little much for him, especially when air travel is involved. But he does like exploring new cities, so he makes the best of it.

That's how he finds himself wandering around downtown Thursday evening. The streets are bustling with the after-work crowd.

Dean pauses when he passes one of those huge angel wing murals that he sees all over the internet. There are a couple of teenage girls standing there posing and giggling. Dean chuckles, and once the girls run off, he snaps a picture of it. His best friend, Jo, loves gimmicky tourist things like that, so he sends the picture off to her, along with a wish you were here text.

"Excuse me, would you mind taking my photo? If you have a moment, of course," a deep voice asks him. Dean looks up to see a man standing there, looking at him hopefully and gesturing behind him toward the mural. He feels his jaw drop open for a second when his eyes rest on the man's face. He's gorgeous. Dark, messy hair and piercing blue eyes that make Dean feel like he's melting into a puddle.

But Dean raises his eyebrow slightly when the question registers in his brain. This guy doesn't really look like the type to want a picture in front of a cotton candy-colored mural of angel wings. He looks to be about Dean's age. He's wearing a full suit with a trench coat on top, despite the summer heat. He realizes he's still staring when the guy clears his throat.

"Sorry for bothering you, I'll find someone else," the man says with a slight nod before beginning to turn away.

"No, no, wait, I'll do it!" Dean says, feeling bad for basically ignoring the guy while checking him out. "You just surprised me. Took my brain a second to process."

The man smiles at him. "Thank you, I appreciate it," he says, handing his phone to Dean. The camera app is already open.

Dean gives him a small smile back. "Not to be weird about it, but you don't really seem like the angel wing mural type."

"Ah, I'm not," he says dryly. Sensing Dean's confusion, probably, he adds, "I sent my daughter a photo of the mural earlier. She's been bombarding me all day with requests that I take a photo in front of it."

Dean smiles wider at that. The man's eyes light up as he's talking about his daughter, and Dean's smitten by how cute it is. "Totally get it, man. If my niece was old enough to text, she'd probably do the same to me." He thinks of little Mary, running around the house in a princess dress and fairy wings as Eileen tries to catch her. Maybe he should take one for her, too. "I've got you." He glances down at the guy's chest and adds, "Take off your badge first."

"What?" the man asks, clearly confused.

Dean pulls his matching conference badge out of his pocket. The lanyards attached to all of the badges this year are a horrid shade of neon orange. "This," Dean says, shaking it slightly, "Take yours off for the picture."

"Oh… thank you," he says, pulling off the lanyard and shoving it into a pocket of his trench coat. He walks in the direction of the mural. He turns and faces Dean, mouth in a straight line.

Dean snaps the photo and frowns. The dude doesn't look happy, despite the joy that was in his eyes when he mentioned his daughter. "Smile, dude! This is for your kid!" Dean says loudly.

The man huffs slightly, but then his mouth splits into a gummy smile, eyes crinkling at the edges. The smile is infectious, and Dean can't help the one that spreads across his own face in response. He takes a couple more photos before he gestures for the guy to come back over. He does and Dean returns his phone.

"Mind taking one of me? Looked at it long enough that I want to send one to my niece anyway."

"Yes, of course," the man replies, taking Dean's offered phone.

Dean smiles and poses (hands on his hips, like a superhero), and there's a good chance the picture captures the laugh that comes out when he hears the other man chuckle.

He walks back over and retrieves his phone. Then, he offers his hand for a handshake. "So I guess we're in town for the same conference. Dean Winchester. It's nice to meet you."

"Castiel Novak," he replies, grasping Dean's hair and shaking it firmly. "It's nice to meet you as well." He pauses for a moment, and his eyes widen with something that looks like recognition. "Dean Winchester. I just read your new paper, Bradbury and Winchester. It was fascinating."

"Hey, thanks, man," Dean says with a grin, "but if I'm being honest, almost all the credit for that one should go to my grad student, Charlie. She's the best."

"Well, it's a testament to your teaching that one of your students can produce such excellent research," Castiel says, and Dean blushes at the words. "I would love to be able to teach like that someday."

"Are you not a professor?" Dean asks. Maybe he misjudged the guy's age.

"No, I actually only recently completed my doctorate. It took a little longer than I'd hoped, but I had to take some time away from schooling for my daughter." Dean nods in understanding. A handful of people he knows had a baby during graduate school and it definitely did not make the experience any easier for them. "I'm beginning a postdoctoral fellowship at the University of Kansas next month, though."

"Oh, no way, that's where I teach!" Dean says. When he sees the glint of amusement in Castiel's eyes, he says, "But you already knew that. Because you just read my paper."

"I did. Different department than you, though. I'll be working with Professor Cain."

Dean smiles. "He's great, you'll like working with him." Before he can continue, Dean's stomach decides to punctuate his sentence with a loud grumble. "Uh, any interest in grabbing dinner? I'm starving, and I'd like to hear more about what you do if we're gonna be colleagues soon."

"Sure, I'd like that, Professor Winchester," Castiel says.

Dean scoffs. "You're uninvited if you call me that, Cas. Just Dean."

"Dean. Okay, let's go," he says, a small smile curling at the edges of his lips. They walk for a while, chatting a little about food and the city until they stumble upon a restaurant that sounds good to both of them.

Once they've ordered, Cas pulls out his phone. "I hope my daughter appreciates the picture," he says, swiping at the screen as he looks through the photos Dean took. He might have gotten a little carried away; there's a bunch. "I don't want to receive another photo of her pouting at me."

Dean chuckles. He pulls out his own phone to send his mural photo to his brother and sister-in-law. Cas also took a few, but he selects one where he's laughing extra hard. Took this for Princess Mary, tell her I love her, he texts to accompany the photo. "I'm sure she'll love it. How many pouting photos did you get?"

Cas hums, tapping a few times on his phone as Dean watches. "It appears… six." He turns his phone around to Dean. The name at the top of the text message thread reads Claire🐝 and he can already see two of the pictures. Cas's daughter, Claire, looks a little older than he expected. That, combined with the heavy eyeliner, doesn't make her seem like the kind of kid that would beg her dad to take a picture with an angel wing mural. Cas scrolls slightly and Dean sees a slew of please dad and you gotta! text messages, interspersed with more pictures of her frowning. It's kind of adorable.

"How old is she?" Dean asks.

"Fifteen," Cas answers. Dean opens his mouth, but closes it again when Cas continues, "I know, I don't look old enough to have a daughter her age. I get that a lot."

"Sorry," Dean mumbles. "No need to explain, I was just surprised."

Cas shrugs. "It's okay. Accidental pregnancy with my high school girlfriend back when we were both trying to convince ourselves that we were straight." Cas immediately blushes. "Sorry, too much information. I had already switched out of professional mode for the evening, and I forgot that we technically work together."

"You're in good company. No judgment from me. You won't be the only one out of the closet when you get there." He winks and then grimaces internally. He hadn't meant to start flirting.

Cas's eyes widen and then soften. "Thank you, Dean. I'm glad I haven't made a total fool of myself." His phone buzzes on the table and he picks it up. He smiles that wide, bright smile again, the one that Dean can't help but match. "Claire loves the photo," he says, turning his phone around. It's another photo of Claire, but this time she has the same bright smile on her face as her dad.

"She really wanted you to take that picture, didn't she," Dean says with a chuckle.

Cas nods. "She did. She's a sweet girl."

"Why's she love angel wings so much? She doesn't really… look the type, I guess," Dean asks, his curiosity finally winning out.

"The eyeliner phase is new. She's always loved angels, though. Her mother used to tell her angels were watching over her every night before bed, and I think that stuck with her."

Dean smiles. "My mom used to say the same thing to me. Definitely sticks with you," he says, as he pushes up the sleeve of his shirt. He holds his arm out to show Castiel the angel wing tattoo on his forearm, his mom's name and the dates she was alive in the middle. "Got this for her a few years ago."

Cas reaches out, brushing the edge of one of the wings. Dean shivers a little at the touch, but mostly just because of how soft and gentle Cas's hands are. "It's beautiful, I'm sure she would appreciate it," Cas says. "I think Claire's mom always said it because I'm named for an angel. Claire calls me her angel when she's feeling sentimental." Dean's not sure if Cas realizes that he's still tracing the edges of his tattoo. Honestly, he doesn't mind. The contact feels nice and he feels surprisingly drawn to Cas. His hand stays there until their food arrives.

The conversation shifts slightly, becoming more casual. They talk about their research, the talks they're planning to attend during the weekend, and a little bit about the university Castiel will soon call home. It's comfortable. Cas is really nice and interesting, and Dean's excited that it looks like he'll have a new friend when the school year starts.

A little voice in the back of his head hopes that he'll end up more than a friend, and Dean thinks the feeling might be mutual when Cas grabs his hand on their way back to the conference hotel.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #371

“some of those that work forces are the same that burn crosses”

What is one song you feel as though you sing particularly well, if any? Probably none, lol. What was the last lengthy task you completed? I love these unique questions I've had lately, but damn, are a lot of my answers "I don't know," lol. What type of photography do you enjoy looking at? Do you take any photos yourself, and if so, what types of things do you prefer to photograph? I love floral and wildlife photography. Landscapes, too, and I have a great fondness for boudoir for reasons I've mentioned in previous surveys. I like taking nature pictures, mainly. Have you ever gone out for the Black Friday shopping rush? Did you enjoy it, or not so much? Or, what’s the busiest shopping day you’ve ever experienced? Hell no, that's a hard pass. I'm sure the busiest shopping experience I've had was like at the mall or something around Christmas, idk. Do you enjoy reading diaries or stories you wrote from when you were younger, or does it embarrass you? If you’ve kept them, was there a particular reason for hanging on to them so long? NO. I DON'T. BECAUSE I CRINGE INTO ANOTHER DIMENSION. I keep a lot of it for memory's sake, but goddamn, is it always embarrassing. What would you say was your first true hobby? What about your most recently developed one? Um... the first thing I really remember is video games. I played Spyro like, a LOT, along with other childhood games. I was just really into gaming at a young age. Is there one thing that throws off your mood more than others, whether it be lack of sleep, lack of food, heat/cold, etc., and when was the last time you felt especially cranky? THE HEAT. I become so irritable. I was needlessly cranky a few days ago for whatever reason. What kinds of things are you likely to complain about? My legs hurting, more than anything. Also being hot. Do you like to put any extra effort into your food in terms of presentation, or do you prefer to just put it on a plate and eat it as it is, no frills? Ha, no. It's not gonna look fancy in my stomach, so whatever. Have you ever dated someone who had kids? No, and I very much doubt I ever would. Are there any candles in the room with you? No. Does the last person you kissed have tattoos? No, but I tell her all the time that dainty nature tattoos would be THE most beautiful on her. When was the last time someone called you pretty? I think when I last updated my Facebook profile picture. Do you like the color pink? It's my favorite! Does your cell phone have a case on it? What color? It came with this thin purple one. What was the last song you had on repeat? "Moon Baby" by Godsmack. Ever kissed someone your parents hated? No. Your most recent ex says he/she hates you, you say? I wouldn't *say* anything, I'd break down sobbing. Would you feel hurt if your last ex was in a relationship? No. Have you ever had to choose between two people? Yes: Jason and Juan. Juan and I dated for less than a day not all that long before Jason and I got together, and Juan was pretty upset. He was nooot a fan of Jason due to a shared ex-girlfriend. Jason, meanwhile, just didn't care. What is the saddest thing that has happened to you? What about the happiest? I think the saddest thing has to be my breakup, especially when you know just how madly in love I was with him and had endless trust that he would never leave, and then he was gone in a flash one night. The happiest is, in turn, my recovery from said split. I found strength in myself and felt hope for once as I learned coping mechanics and got a psychiatrist that was worth a shit in my partial hospitalization program. What was the last new drink you discovered that was delicious? *shrug* Do you have a YouTube channel? Yes. I don't make videos anymore, though. Were you happy as a teenager? God no, my depression was awful. What do you do for your mom on Mother’s Day? Sigh. Not enough. I just tell her happy Mother's Day, give her a hug, and try to be an extra good daughter. Do you know anyone who follows a raw vegan diet and lifestyle? No. Can you go see a doctor alone or do you like to take someone with you? I can do it alone (but only have once), but I like to bring my mom with me still. Would you have sex with someone of the same gender as you? I'm bi, so. Have you ever had a concussion? One or two, I can't remember. How many dresses do you own? Zero. Do you know anyone who has a pet gecko? Yeah, my friend Summer has a darling leopard gecko. I want oneeeeee. They look so damn derpy and adorable, and their chill demeanor is something I really like in pets. Would you ever go bear hunting? No. Absolutely never. Do you prefer drawing or painting? Any particular reason why? Drawing, for sure. At least you can erase stuff, and paint is just so messy. Do you like raisins? NO THANKS MAN. Do you remember your locker combinations from high school? Nope. Do you forget to flip the page of your calendar at the start of each month? I don't have a calendar. Are you racist to any race? Nope. Have you ever intentionally hurt an animal? I've given cats and dogs a small pop on the rear, but nothing more than that. I hate doing even that, but with the language barrier and all, sometimes it's the only way to get your point across. Do you own any autographed memorabilia? No. Have you ever dated a twin? No. Oreos or Chips Ahoy? Oreos. Have you ever considered being a cop? Yeah, no thank you. What’s your favorite superhero movie? Maybe Logan. I thought it was very emotional and just overall a good movie. Name somebody you know who deserves a better life than they have: MY MOM. Name something that you’re good at but don’t like: uhhhhhhhh Name something that you’re bad at but DO like: Dancing, maybe. Which is worse: Stale chips or flat soda? Stale chips, for sure. It's certainly not my preference, but I can drink flat soda. Who’s the hottest guy and hottest girl out there? M-Mark Fischbach. :') Girl... let's seeeeee... maybe Alissa White-Gluz from Arch Enemy. GodDAMN what a WOMAN. ❤_❤ Do you ever trip over your pets? Yes, because he just looooves to follow me at my feet. What’s your relationship like with your exes? Aaron, Juan, Jason, and Tyler: nonexistent. Sara and Girt: great. What was the last thing you turned down doing? Going to my nephew's t-ball game. I always feel bad when I say no when Mom asks if I wanna go... but at least the kids know I just don't handle the heat well. Are you a party animal? Faaaaar from it, my friend. Who are you the biggest fan of? m-m-m-mMARKIPLIER You’re DJ for the night - first track to get everyone going? Uhhhh maybe "Party Hard" by Andrew W.K.? Have you ever been hit on by a pushy person? I think Juan was kinda pushy, but not to an uncomfortable degree. He respected what I felt. What accent do you find attractive? Most attractive, British. But I also really like Scottish and Irish. Also French accents in women I tend to find very beautiful-sounding. Have you ever had feelings for a friend's partner? Yes. What’s your favorite thing to do that doesn’t cost much? Drive around take pictures, maybe? Let's, uh, ignore the whole gas crisis in this answer. When in danger are you more fight or flight? Flight. Do you feel self conscious about a certain body part? *gestures to entire body* Have you been accused of being manipulative? Yes. Have you ever considered violence to solve your problem? No. Are you romantic? I personally think so. If you are a smoker, how long does a pack typically last you? If you aren’t a smoker, does anybody you are close to smoke, & if so, are you against the fact that they’re a smoker? I don't smoke. To answer the next part, yes, like my dad and stepmom. I wish they would stop so badly, like it's literally going to kill them both. Do you have more subscribers or more people that you are subscribed to? On YouTube? I'm definitely subscribed to waaay more people. Is there anything that has been drilled into your brain since you were young & you finally decided to stop listening to? How did it feel once you decided to listen to yourself over what you were told? Yes: "finish your plate." Teaching your kid to eat beyond their comfort can be very destructive, and I'm glad I never stuck to that once Mom stopped enforcing it. If you are currently in a relationship, what is one thing that seems to be unique or different about your relationship with this person, compared to other relationships in general? If you are currently single, is this more of a choice or is it more just the way things are going, not really something you chose? If you are neither “single” or officially in a relationship, what are your feelings on your current situation? I'm single, and it's just how it is. I know realistically I wouldn't tell what felt like the right person no, but it really is probably better that I stay single and keep figuring my shit out. Think of somebody famous that you have a lot of respect for. What is something that you really admire them for? To name just one thing I admire in Mark, his relentless "I'm going to do this no matter what" attitude is very inspirational to me. He lets like... n-o-t-h-i-n-g get in his way. If somebody were to leave a harsh comment on a survey you took, judging you on one of your opinions, how would you react? I'd get pretty self-conscious, just because I in general take judgment quite poorly. I obsess over "what if they're right, and you're just an idiot?". Are there any other sites you use to find surveys to take? What sites do you use? I mainly use Tumblr and LiveJournal, but in times of great desperation, I'll use Bzoink and just google surveys as well, haha. Have you sent or received any friend requests on Facebook lately? Not sent, but I got one from someone I had no mutual friends with the other day. Safe to say I declined it. Can you recall the last time you turned down an offer, of any kind? Uhhhhh no. Which fruit would you say you eat the most often? Apples. What was your pet’s last vet visit concerning? Roman has been to the vet once to get neutered (and I think shots?). I took Venus many years ago because I thought she had a respiratory infection. Thank god, she didn't. Which animals do you tend to go check out first at pet stores? The reptiles, snakes in particular. Have you ever been a victim of a house fire? No. What’s the longest you’ve ever had to wait before being seated at a restaurant? Like, over an hour. Have you ever had a cavity before? How about a root canal? A tooth pulled? Braces? Cavities and braces, yes. What is your favorite zoo animal that you would like to set free? Probably polar bears. Like especially here, it gets so hot in the summer, and the poor things sometimes only have a bit of snow in the shade. Like... they can't be very happy. Especially when you see those videos of them playing in snow, and then you think about situations like our zoo here... ugh. What kinds of artifacts fascinate you? I really think old figurines built with like clay and stuff are cool. But all artifacts I find to be very intriguing. It's so interesting to see that the desire to create has always been with us as a species. Is there anyone that you’ve visited in jail? No.

[nobaettadr]

on leif’s skill ranks, boons, and banes. you asked for this months ago @boundlesshart so here you go KJHKSJDH

sword ( boon. )

lance ( boon. )

axe

bow

gauntlet 

reason

faith ( bane. )

authority ( bane. | budding talent » boon. )

heavy armor ( boon. )

riding

flying

— SWORD. part of this being a boon has to do with it being the weapon that leif has the most experience fighting with. he inherits his light brand — his signature weapon — from his mother, ethlyn, and it’s the only personal thing he has of his parents. it’s pretty much like a third arm to him at this point, and he’s just about never seen without it. it’s always going to be his main weapon in battle.

if he hadn’t been using the light brand since he first learned how to fight, he probably wouldn’t have specialized in swords and would have focused more on spears and lances like all leonster knights ( and to be more like his father ). but years of familiarity have made it one of his strong points.

edit: in addition, his minor baldr blood from his mom’s side also helps give him inherited proficiency with swords naturally as well. thank you bren i deadass always forget he has minor baldr.

— LANCE. wielding a lance is in leif’s blood more than it is in the blood of almost any other gen 2 kid since he’s the prince of leonster, home of the lanze ritter, leonster’s famous lance knights. every well known name from leonster has been a lance knight, from finn to his father and his father’s father before him, etc. they fly the standard of the gae bolg, after all, and i hc that noba herself was also a lance knight.

it’s also the weapon he received the most training with along with his sword, and has the most experience training against, as finn was in charge of much of his upbringing and taught him most of the combat maneuvers that he knows. leif has extensive experience with lance and spear fighting, even if it’s not his go-to on the battlefield.

— AXE. the first time leif learned how to use an axe was when he arrived in fiana. i have about 300 headcanons on his bromance with othin and havan ( HIS FIGHTER BROOOOS ) but essentially after the initial mutual huffing and puffing and general horsing around and hazing that dudes do to each other when they’re teenagers, they developed a lot of respect for each other and the brothers became like family to leif as he grew attached to the community he had found in fiana and especially within the fiana freeblades.

it’s from primarily othin and havan that leif learned the axe part of training to become a master knight, and he finds that he enjoys the style. parts of it fit his kind of fighting better — as much as finn tried to teach him proper form, proper footwork, and clean maneuvers, leif largely learned how to fight by... well, being forced to for his life. and sometimes it feels nice to just grab an axe and start raging.

— BOW. i actually headcanon that the bow is one of the last things leif learned how to use in his desire to become proficient with every weapon. he picked up magic early, so for a long time he felt that was enough to handle ranged attacks. his exposure to the bow was largely a clutch one, i think — probably some battle where they needed to open fire on a distant enemy unit and he didn’t have a tome on him, so he kind of fished around for a fallen soldier’s bow, joined the archer unit taking aim, and did his best to emulate what he’d seen others do before. every little bit helped, after all. prior to that, he’d likely used a bow here and there before, mostly in his younger years and in fiana for hunting, but this was likely the first time he’d used it in combat.

he’s since taken to it, but doesn’t get the chance to use it much for the above reasons, so his skill with it comes and goes and he gets rusty. if he were to commit himself to training with one though, i think leif would be pretty decent at it. not enough for it to be a boon or a particular talent, but he’s stockily built and has the shoulder and arm span to make a good archer.

— GAUNTLET. brand new to leif! he’s engaged in hand to hand combat before, but obviously gauntlets are not a weapon in jugdral, and he’s eager to try out this new style of fighting. i think leif would probably be pretty good at it; he’s a brawling type of kid, doesn’t mind getting in the mud and tripping his opponents and scratching eyes if that’s what it takes to survive. despite being essentially raised by a knight. i don’t think he’d necessarily use them very often, and the knightly types common across jugdral aren’t likely going to be very open about what they’d see as a pretty barbaric way of fighting, but i think leif would enjoy learning yet another new style and seeing that traveling around means there’s plenty more different kinds of weapons he can pick up.

— REASON. while not necessarily a mage as his go-to and on the whole much more comfortable with physical weapons, leif has a reasonable foundation for magic given that his mother had a lot of magic in her blood. he can definitely cast well, though will probably never be fully comfortable handling high level tomes, preferring to leave those to the Real Mages who are much more skilled and qualified to be slinging those around. but anything C-rank and below, he’s happy to use.

leif took to magic largely for practical reasons: having range on the battlefield without having to rely solely on his light brand. the sword, which gives him some good range option, isn’t always enough to cut it, and sometimes he just needs more firepower. as with much of the rest of the weapon types he learned, he was tutored in magic rather informally by his peers: asvel and, later, sety, were his primary teachers in wind magic, and, combined with some of the other mages in the army, later fire magic as well. i headcanon that olwen was his primary tutor in thunder magic, and she was a strict teacher who taught him according to a long and proud freege tradition.

leif’s never going to rely too much on magic, but he can sling around an elfire or two with the best of them.

— FAITH. strangely, despite leif often being shown with his light brand and a stave ( courtesy of his first appearance outside of his home game being as a trickster in awakening’s lost bloodlines dlc ), i think that light magic is actually the hardest spellcasting for him to master. in jugdral, as in many other fe titles, light magic is its own category of magic separate from the anima trinity, which is reflected in a lot of jugdral’s stave users also being light magic users, or mages’ weapon ranks often prioritizing either anima or light magic.

whatever it is about light magic that makes it different, it causes leif a lot of difficulty. i think that, though he’s passable with it, he struggles to control it, and struggles to be able to summon up and cast the spells as easily as he can the others, even with a tome. this is reflected in leif’s weapon ranks as a master knight, where light magic is at C while he has A rank in everything else.

additionally, while leif is handy with a stave and definitely likes having one or two on him at all times in order to help out an ally whenever it’s needed, i have a headcanon that he’s on the whole more comfortable with support staves than he is with healing ones. he can handle a basic live / heal and even a relive / mend well enough, but anything higher than that and he’ll try to push it off onto a more qualified healer. this comes from a longstanding hc that a soldier under his care died of severe loptyr magic injuries — in terrible pain and just all around horrible to witness — despite leif’s best efforts with a restore stave, and the experience affected him deeply.

in terms of learning staves, of course i think nanna was the forerunner in helping him, but there were many others who would have been able to help tutor him as well: tina, linoan, sara, safy, to name a few.

— AUTHORITY. authority is both leif’s achilles heel and also one of his best points i think, hence it being down as a budding talent bane that, with time, turns into a boon. i think this most aptly reflects his character growth in both coming into the role he’s always been told he has to take, as well as his own growth as a person who struggles with feeling confident in said role.

it’s worth noting that in fe5, leif promotes from prince » lord, and then in fe4, from lord » master knight; i’ve long run with the theory that in fe5, leif is actually in a kind of like ‘ trainee ’ class stage, and this is actually why he’s such a lackluster unit in that game while he becomes one of fe4′s best gen2 units. and i think this has something to do with it.

leif has grown up knowing he’s the rightful heir to leonster and being groomed by everyone around him for the day he’s going to take back the throne. however, prior to the war actually starting, he has no experience leading. he’s been protected by finn and the various people who’ve agreed to hide him, and he’s just spent his life on the run. he has no leadership experience, any idea how to rally morale from a disheartened and hopeless population ( more than one NPC in fe5 is less than enthused about leif’s army coming in to ‘ make things worse for them ’, essentially ), or any idea how to be a prince. august and dorias are making pretty much all the plans and decisions for him, and he’s, in many ways, a figurehead who’s good at running into battle.

it’s not that leif doesn’t want to lead and be inspiring, but he doesn’t know how. he doesn’t have the scaffolding. finn was a knight, not a captain or a general, so he didn’t know how to teach him, either.

so, classically, leif goes a long time without knowing how to make decisions on his own. he knows what he wants to do, but the execution is planned by his advisers. i hc that the first time leif realizes he really has to lead is after dorias dies. because of his own poor leadership skill. his bad judgment costs him the life of not only one of his army’s leaders but also a very close father figure. after this, leif is forced to figure out how to be more proactive in taking command. and it’s one of the hardest things he’s ever had to do, because not only does he have little idea how to go about it, but he’s also already experienced a major failure.

of course, others help him a lot. august, selfina, xavier, linoan, olwen: people who are experienced in leadership positions. without each one of these people, leif would have floundered. as fe5 moves into fe4, he gains even more people to learn from and also picks it up from watching others like his cousin. he tries to contribute more to war meetings, tries to think more critically, learns from what others are saying and how they’re thinking.

and he continues to make mistakes. thankfully, none as big as the one that cost him dorias and nearly cost him the newly-reclaimed leonster castle, but he continues to do the wrong things sometimes. most of those times, there’s someone else there to check him. and each time, he feels the setback, he feels ashamed in himself, he questions whether he just isn’t good enough, will never be like celice and aless and the others. often, he considers just giving up. half the time, the only thing that stops him is that there straight up isn’t a ‘ give up ’ option; no one else can rule leonster.

but leif also has some qualities of a natural — and fantastic — leader. he never considers himself above anyone else, or more important than anyone else. he naturally wants to get to know everyone possible; he’s the ‘ everyman ’ king; he’s personable and selfless. people rally under him because he’s also their friend, and he’ll throw himself into ballista fire in order to buy time for them to escape a locked fortress without a second thought. he will never, ever leave a single ally behind. that’s the kind of person leif is; he’s not charismatic in the same way as sigurd, but he makes people want to follow him for a different reason.

for this, and because he works so hard to try and become even a fraction of what the people of new thracia need, authority is his budding talent, and eventually becomes a boon.

— HEAVY ARMOR. as mentioned on his doss. page, fandom likes to portray leif as small and slight, but i’ve headcanoned him as quite the opposite. both fe5 and fe4′s growths write him as more defensively oriented than speed-oriented. he has high bulk growths and middling-average speed growths. i headcanon him with a strong constitution: the kid’s stocky and it takes a lot to bring him down. he’s healthy, with a strong body; he withstood near-death by debilitating loptyr magic more than once.

his fighting style thus favors bulk. he’ll take hits so he can dish them back out just as hard or harder, and he’s as tenacious as a bulldog. he goes down and keeps getting back up, again and again. i keep talking about the ballista stunt until the day i die but that’s another example of Leif Being Leif TM.

he’d have a strong proclivity for heavy armor, i think, if he tried it, or at least fighting with a shield. i tend to imagine him on the battlefield with more armor than his official art shows him wearing, and it would certainly suit his preference of being at the head of the charge, taking hits for the rest of his allies.

— RIDING. i debated for a loooong time on whether to make this a boon as well, but aside from feeling like it was bad taste to give him essentially 5 boons and only 1 bane, i eventually decided not to because, despite his lineage, leif himself is surprisingly more fond of fighting on foot.

it’s incongruous. he’s descended from lance knights in a continent that’s so balls huge that pretty much everyone worth their salt is a mounted unit just so they can get places. both his parents were mounted units ( lance knight and troubadour ), both the people who raised him were mounted units ( lance knight and master knight ) and most of those closest to him are mounted units. leif does know how to fight on horseback ( hence promoting into master knight ), but i don’t think he has the natural inclination for it that one would expect.

i imagine that leif probably took to horseback fighting because a.) it was practical, especially if he wanted to stay at the front of the formation and b.) it’s what he’s expected to do as the prince of leonster and future commander of the lanze ritter. but beyond that, i headcanon that he’s more comfortable actually jumping off his horse in the midst of the fray after the initial charge and engaging the enemy on foot where possible. he feels more in control that way, and it’s just what he’s used to.

— FLYING. i also debated for a while on whether to make this a bane ahaha but in the end i decided not because i couldn’t think of much of a reason why it would be other than ‘ he’s not used to it ’. in jugdral, obviously only women are able to be pegasus knights ( and all from silesse, so unless you’re silesian, you just... don’t know what a pegasus is, i presume ), and wyvern riders are all from south thracia and leif is no way getting on a wyvern cause uh. those things killed his family and tyrannized him his whole life. no thanks. you’re lucky enough if he gets close to one and doesn’t immediately take out his sword.

so leif has never had any reason to be airborne. i think it’d probably freak him out a little bit; he’s too used to having two feet firmly on the ground and losing that solid control would spook him. i don’t think he’d really like fighting from the air or flying very much for that reason — not a fear of heights, since he doesn’t mind being in high places, but just... not his thing. but hey, the boy will try anything once and he might surprise me, so who knows.

[birb-fanus-oz]

I really like this au, very adorable, but I think I got here a little late so I'm confused. Could you please help me understand the context?

Hi! Sorry for the long wait. I wanted to answer, but I didn’t have a lot of time after work and I wasn’t sure how to explain it very well. Here’s my attempt at a coherent condensed sorta explanation for this AU:

For the extreme shorthand explanation (Please note that everything is still in the concept stage and some stuff will change or require more explanation in the future):

Ozpin was orginally a bird fanus who was possessed by Ozma after the death of his mother who was a friend KoV!Ozma was trying to rescue. Throughout his younger years, Ozpin was an undercover agent who rescued and broke down illegal fanus slavery/trades and met a very young Qrow and they both made a significant impact on each other’s lives. However, he lost one of his wings in a mission and purposely removed his other wing after an incident so no one could use his Fanus background against him in the future.

Timeskip to the future, after Jinn and Oscar running away, Oscar accidentally does a mind dive into his soul/the past and encounters a young teenager fanus who turns out to be a piece of Ozpin’s soul that didn’t pass away. Soul!Ozpin helps guide Oscar to Ozma who’s processing the combined trauma of his past/Ozpin’s memories and processing Ozpin’s death. After learning more about Ozma and what Ozpin and Ozma were trying to do to prevent Salem from destroying humanity, Oscar becomes closer to them and starts learning magic.

After Ozpin comes back and the group cautiously make amends to each other, Ozpin and Qrow have confrontation where they still didn’t have the full conversation they need, but in the end, affirm that they are willing to work things out with each other in this new setting (note to self: this will be the third version of Ozpin, Qrow had interacted with). Ozpin does make sure that Qrow knows he definitely owes Oscar an apology though. The group gets separated (kids to school?) and Oscar stays behind with Ironwood to work on his training to catch up to the others and that’s when he accidentally extracted Ozpin’s soul from Ozma and placed it into BB!Oz who was supposed to be a golem of a sort, but Oscar did not provide any materials except the himself. Qrow (who was doing investigations with Maria, Winter and Ironwood) gets called back to help Oscar.

Now for the extreme long version that’s still incomplete....

Before and the beginning of Ozpin’s Birth:

King of Vale!Ozma was working on trying to fix relations between the kingdoms after the war and worked with Ozpin’s mother (bird fanus;haven’t decided on name but probably is a bird pun) who was one of his undercover agents. However, she got captured and was illegally sold as a slave to a group in Atlas. KoV!Ozma always tried to find her but there were still post!war tensions and the fear of possibly blowing her cover.

Despite her hardships, she managed to befriend a shy mechanical toy maker who helped hacked her collar so she can move about freely and gather information. They hung out with each other enough that eventually, baby Ozpin (not his original name though) was born and a deadline to escape was made promptly. For the beginning of baby Ozpin’s life, he was taken care of by his other parent while birb mom took care of escape precautions. Birb mom’s partner made the original Birdie for baby Ozpin to confuse sensors and for a good cuddle.

However, accidents happened and only Ozpin and his mother ended up being the ones to escape to Mistral Underground where his distraught mother had to teach Baby!Ozpin to never stand out too much since wing-type fanus are rare. She also inadvertently taught him how to hide in public by working as a dancer/singer with many disguises to gather information to try to get KoV!Ozma to come rescue them.

However, around the time KoV!Ozma got her message, they were betrayed and found out by a fellow Fanus who sold them out to to rescue their own family. Ozpin had Birdie taken from him so in order to save him from being branded and secured with a new collar, birb mom made Ozpin wear hers instead while she was forced to get a new one.

After some unknown time, KoV!Ozma finally managed to track them both down and attempt a rescue raid with some trusted friends. However, during the rescue process, Salem’s assassins were also tracking KoV!Ozma and attacked at the same time, resulting in a bloody mess from all sides. Unfortunately, while viciously fighting back to defend her child and KoV!Ozma, she was too weak from the prolonged imprisonment to survive a brutal blow that became fatal on contact. Upon seeing his dead friend and her tramatized child, KoV!Ozma was shocked enough that he too, was killed by one of the assassins who were waiting for an opportunity to strike.

Since Ozpin and KoV!Ozma were both traumatized by Ozpin’s mother’s death, Ozma’s soul ended up in Ozpin and Ozma was forced to take control early on so he could bring Ozpin away from danger by convincing his friends to run away with the young child. After that, Ozma’s soul went into slumber as he used up too much energy too early; plus he has to deal with his previous host’s death and integration with him. Ozpin by himself, with a few occasional voices of reassurance, was passed on and helped by a Ozma’s allies/friends and random strangers (both fanus and not) to safety in Vale.

Once finally there, under the care of trusted friends of his mother (the school staff), he collapsed into a catatonic state for a few months and woke up at the same time as Ozma. Ozpin consented to Ozma taking control for a while and watched as Ozma interacted with his friends and the people in Vale, but never did anything Ozpin that made Ozpin nervous or scared. Eventually, Ozma had a heart-soul talk with Ozpin and shared his painful experiences with Ozpin so he wouldn’t feel alone and that, even Ozma feels scared and afraid like Ozpin.

After finally coming out and being with people who were kind and non-judgmental of him, Ozpin overheard and found out about how illegal fanus slavery was still very much so present and a big problem. Learning that his mother was one of their most accomplished spies and that Ozma was trying to fix this issue for a long time, Ozpin decided that he wanted to move forward by following his parent’s footsteps and help with Ozma’s mission to unite mankind so no one will ever go through what he did. Ozma was very resistant to a child risking his life, especially when one as frail as Ozpin, but he could never deny his hosts’ will and he understood that this was a choice they were willing to dedicate themselves to following. The best he could do was teach Ozpin the most effective way to fight and survive.

His mother’s/Ozma’s friends, taught him her dances and songs as well as proper disguises for his age and figure. And when Ozma was being elusive, they told him about their experiences with Ozma as well. After a few years of experiencing the awkwardness of Ozma and only starting to break out of his insecure personality, he decides that not only is he going to help others like him and Ozma’s mission, but he’s going to protect Ozma as well. At the time, Ozma accepted this with good humor since Ozpin was just learning to be confident and has no idea what this will lead to...

Pre-Team STRQ Time:

After some intense training and having the impatience of a teenager, Ozpin goes on his first mission and messes up due to nerves and lingering PTSD. Ozma was trying to calm him down so he can make escape plans when a very young and injuried Qrow found Ozpin’s cage. BBY!Qrow was more interested and curious about Ozpin instead of being malicious like the other bandits so Ozpin calmed down and they had a nice quiet conversation. They couldn’t see each other that well but Ozpin could smell blood from Qrow’s scratches and bruises so he gave Qrow a quick heal with his magic. Qrow was bewildered and impressed so in order to cover up his skill, Ozpin covered the magic aspect by claiming that he’s training to be a huntsman. Being young enough to accept that explanation, this was the starting point of Qrow’s interest in Hunters before finding out about Maria. In order to repay Ozpin for the heal, Qrow set off some distractions on the day of the big auction and set Ozpin free.

Ozpin repayed Qrow with for this favor in the near future by rescuing him in the forest where Qrow was lost and severely injuried. Previously, Qrow and Raven were supposed to watch an example of how their bandit group operated but the Grimm that were supposed to distract the Hunters were more numerous than expected and spread to the auction on the side. During this time, Ozpin was one of the members who alerted the authorities of the Grimm distractions/auction and helped escort the enslaved Fanus to safety before making his own run in order to protect his undercover status. Then he found Qrow who was separated from his group and disorientated from pretty much everything. When Qrow was finally reunited with Raven/his group, he just thought he made up an imaginary friend based off that bird fanus he rescued b/c no one else saw him when they found Qrow.

A few years later, Ozpin was near fatally injuried in a mission/set up where he lost one of his wings. Qrow was the one who stumbled upon him and helped provide him a safe place to recover without realizing that this fanus was the same fanus from his childhood at first b/c of Ozpin’s disguise. With some subtle hints revealing themselves every now and then, Qrow finally realizes who Ozpin is but at the same time, Ozpin’s pursuers were rumored to be in the area so Qrow rushed to warn him. But he was too late when he only found bloodied feathers and no body. This tramatized him for a while and made him more aggressive until he forced himself to forget the reason why he’s so angry and sad. In the meantime, Ozpin actually escaped against his will because he was in such a bad state that Ozma had to forcefully control him to get to safety since Ozpin couldn’t think straight and associated Qrow with safety. Ozpin could not find Qrow when he searched later on b/c the tribe moved away.

That year and a few before was a bit tension fueled between Ozpin and Ozma b/c Ozpin took on so many undercover missions that left him with many injuries and of the such, but he never let Ozma take control during those times anymore after the first few attempts when Ozma pretended he wasn’t in pain. Guilt and avoidance from both sides prevented them from talking it out until Ozma forced Ozpin to safety after his wing was lost. Feelings were complicated when recovering at a safehouse, Ozpin and Ozma shared fevered nightmares where Ozpin’s recent accident mixed with Ozma’s old memories of being tortured by Salem over the years. When the fever finally broke, Ozma was the one in control and panicked about it for a while b/c Ozpin’s presence was too quiet. When Ozma started fearing Ozpin hated him and tried to apologize, Ozpin just quietly and tiredly reassured him that he wasn’t angry and that over the years, he trusts Ozma’s intentions and his attempts to help humanity were genuine.

Although Ozpin and Ozma’s relationship grew better and became more of a true partnership, Ozpin had to acknowledge the loss of his wing caused not only his health to deteriorate, but he also had to change his fighting style and escape paths. Old comrades in the know started suggesting him to retire b/c he was standing out too much and the attempts on his life were starting to become more focused. He was finally convinced to retire and become a teacher when one of the fanus teenagers he rescued convinced him that he would be a great teacher who treated them all equally. This is when he finally took on the name “Ozpin” and destroyed records of his old name.

While he was a teacher, the teenaged fanus who convinced him, was his first student and they both helped covered for each other’s fanus states. Ozpin’s chronic pains forced him to use his cane quite often while he worked on a spell to reduce them since medicine was that advanced yet, so after his first student graduated, they went undercover as his bodyguard by pretending to be his aide most of the time. However, Ozpin’s other wing was discovered by somebody (probably Merlot) and his student was killed protecting Ozpin. Afterwards, Ozpin had his wing surgically removed (and from the drawing, cut his hair) and used most of his magic to keep his body functional. However, depression took over and Ozma was the one usually in control when Ozpin was too tired. Eventually, he recovered enough to focus on training the students of Beacon the best he can until he became the headmaster of Beacon. Then he met Qrow again.

Oscar with Ozpin and birb!Ozpin

Although Ozpin lost and was dying painfully by being burned alive, he refused to let Ozma take control b/c he knew how afraid Ozma was of fire. Ozma’s desperate attempts to save him resulted in their death and unusual reincarnation in which Ozma and a piece of Ozpin’s soul woke up too early in Oscar. It was too early for Ozma so Ozpin ended up guiding Oscar against the clock b/c of how dangerous everything is after Beacon’s fall and his death and Ozma fell asleep for a while to recover. The reality of his death was pushed to the side as Ozpin tried to adjust to everything and control his boundaries with Oscar. However, after Jinn and Ozma’s traumas influencing him as well his Qrow’s rejection, both Ozpin and Ozma fell into a vortex of depression and self-hate and shut themselves away from Oscar to protect him.

After the Oscar ran away from the group in Argus, he kept desperately trying to contact Ozpin, and accidentally caused a fusion of magic and aura when he dived into his own mind/soul and summoned a guide to help him. That guide turned out to be teenaged!Ozpin when he had both of his wings and was more confident in his skills. Not to mention, he was a bit mischievous as well since he liked using subtle magic tricks to trick Salem and her group in the past. Oscar didn’t realize this was Ozpin at first and until they started going through the memory sequences of Ozpin’s life to reach Ozma who was struggling with his traumas, plus accepting Ozpin’s death/memories.

A/N: Sorry, this is as much as I can keep straight in my head. Some details are still shaky and this is mostly self-indulgent stuff but I think it’s as close to canon as I can keep it considering there’s pretty much almost nothing known about Ozpin himself. There are also details or events missing/not written down b/c the original drawing post would have more but I don’t remember right now.

I hope you and others enjoy this backstory that I’ll try to convey. I didn’t go into Team STQR years, Post Team STQR years or after Vol.6 stuff b/c I’m either still deciding on it or it’ll have spoilers for this AU’s plot. (-∀-`; )

[roxiemegs]

A teacher-mama’s rant

Those who know me personally are probably aware that I’ve been in the habit of sort of “adopting” various kids and teenagers. I’ve been happily married twice—which sounds funny, until I reveal that I was widowed at a relatively young age. Both of these good men were previously married, and had children that I came to know and love as if they’d been mine—even though they weren’t in my house full-time. I’ve step-mothered a grand total of seven kids: four girls, three boys. I also have an almost-three-year-old little girl with my husband.

When my first husband died, I only got to see his kids twice more: at the funeral, and when they came to get stuff from our home. This wasn’t by my choice, but because their mother had never liked me, had spent the years of my marriage systematically belittling her ex and his “fat wife” to not just the children, but to anyone whose social circles might happen to overlap with both of ours. Any attempt on my family���s part to communicate with the children after their father’s passing was met with hostility and barely-veiled threats.

To contrast, my second husband’s ex-wife has only ever been kind to me and about me to everyone, openly encouraging her children to love me and be happy about their father’s remarriage. We aren’t best friends, we don’t always agree on everything; but we are friendly, and we can come to an agreement on tough issues without animosity. The effect on these children’s mental health and self-concept is monumentally different than in the first case.

Why the background? It’s certainly not to air past grievances, though if you want to hear some wild “I thought that kind of thing only happened as a dramatic ploy in movies” stories, give me a shout. What this is about is, you might say I’ve become rather good at parenting other people’s children.

This is compounded by the fact that, by profession, I’m a teacher. It’s not the best-paying job for a person with a master’s degree, but I love it. I work at a school that is almost smack-dab in the center of Salt Lake County, Utah. I teach high school Spanish, but I’m also privileged to teach improv comedy theatre and coach an amazing team of comedic actors. I don’t expect Spanish to be everyone’s favorite class. It wasn’t mine when I was a teenager. But I build a rapport with my teenaged students that improves my life, and I believe it improves theirs. A lot of people that age don’t feel comfortable talking with their parents about their problems—not because of something wrong with the parents or the kids, but because they’re stretching into the independence of adulthood. I’ve become the trusted adult confidante for some vibrant adolescent people going through things nobody would want to.

I’ve taught in four different schools across two states: both public and charter, in Florida and Utah. I’ve taught at a high school, middle school, a K-8, and a K-12 (though the latter two have had me teach secondary kids only). I’ll be the first to admit, large groups of small children scare me. I adore my sass-bucket of a toddler, and have real love and affection for many children of friends and family members, but once you gather more than five of the really young ones together, I’m looking to skedaddle. My favorite group to teach is high schoolers, followed by middle schoolers. I personally believe that decent people who teach elementary school deserve a free pass straight to heaven.

With my high schoolers, they prefer for me to discipline with humor, even good-natured sarcasm. Yes, it exists. The secret is that they have to recognize that the snark is said with genuine affection and concern for their well-being. Because I have developed an easy-going balance of individuality, respect, and classroom rules that prevent violations of either, I rarely have large discipline issues crop up.

Being a teacher in Utah, which is the well-known capital of mormondom, comes with some interesting variations from the norm I came to know in Florida. In the interest of full disclosure, I am LDS, and have been my whole life. I was raised in a combination of states, birth through age 12 on the East Coast, then junior high through college in Utah. I remember living in the Bible Belt in my later childhood, and meeting people who’d never known a Mormon. My own sister had a close friend once that, when her family found out we were LDS, basically dropped all connection with us. I’ve had friends of other Christian faiths (yes, I do see myself as Christian, and no, I don’t accept your classification of me as not) who have sheepishly told me that their pastors have said some nasty things about my faith over the pulpit. Other friends whose primary knowledge of Mormons come from jokes on South Park, binge-watches of Big Love or Sister Wives, or the Book of Mormon musical. Of course, none of these accurately portray LDS doctrine, and mostly focus on lampooning the culture that has grown up around the religion.

But, bypassing the issues I have with entertainment that purposefully mischaracterizes anybody’s faith, there’s something that’s been on my mind as a student, and much later, a teacher in the Beehive State. When I moved here as an almost-teen, I had some major culture shock, HAVING GROWN UP MORMON. It was strange being one of many Mormon kids at school, hearing others in the halls talk about mutual or going to the temple, or any number of things at school. It was off-putting to me to see some of the same kids who were all mormony at church turn around and say and do some very non-mormony things at school. I often managed to find open-minded friends who were not really judgmental towards others (yeah, I write this after just passing judgment—my whole thing is, whatever you claim to believe, act it, and don’t be a jerk about it). Even as a young teenager, though, it BOILED MY BLOOD when people I knew excluded the non-LDS kids because they weren’t Mormon. And I totally called them on it when I saw it. Because I lived on the other side of that. My mom had it worse, and sometimes told me childhood stories of how kids at her school in South Carolina asked to feel her horns. I mean, our own Sunday School lessons often rehashed the histories of the early members of our faith being verbally abused, physically assaulted in various painful and dehumanizing ways, driven out of a string of places, and even martyred for being different. I wanted sometimes to just scream at people for being so sanctimonious that they couldn’t see how counterproductive it was to our claim of Christianity.

Calm down, Meg. It still makes me really angry, though I like to think it’s more along the lines of Jesus chasing the money-lenders out of the temple than along the lines of Herod being miffed at another king happening and ordering deaths as a result.

Back to the school where I teach. Overall, there have been a few factors that seem to have reduced bullying there greatly from the average school of that size. It still exists: wherever you have teenaged people on the path to self-discovery, you’ll find some whose insecurities drive their mean behavior towards others. But I have seen much less of it in our specific student population. We are also more diverse than your average Utah school. In many areas of the state, a visit to school will show you a bunch of white faces, with a tiny sprinkle of other other groups. This isn’t to say I don’t like white people or any other people, but having lots of different racial, cultural, and religious backgrounds represented is fun and fascinating to me. Humanity is this gorgeous mosaic, and the presence of so many shades of skin and eyes and hair, the scents of foods we call “comfort” and those we deem “exotic”, the songs inherent to the accents of the languages of the Earth...they all make it more beautiful.

I’ve heard kids of both LDS and non-LDS backgrounds bemoan ill treatment from the other side, and rightfully so. I’ve personally overheard some kids making the blanket statements of “all Mormons are...” That being said, it’s not nearly as common as the numerous stories of “they were my friends until it became clear I wasn’t interested in coming to church” from both students AND adults of my acquaintance.

It breaks my heart to think back on this week, hearing a mother recount to me how her daughter, a bright, talented, kind young woman, has been repeatedly marginalized by people who should be her friends on grounds of shared values, not passing acquaintances because she worships differently. Just like any mother, her tears were deep-seated, thinking back on the pain her beautiful child has endured from people who regularly consider themselves to be some of the nicest people in the world.

This is NOT a religious thing. It stands against all doctrine of which I’m aware. By being exclusive, by all these series of small unkindnesses, by being dismissive of those who don’t share ALL beliefs and values, you become for others what we’ve always denounced in the mobs that persecuted the early members of the church.

I’m a believer in the doctrine. The culture we’ve created surrounding it still needs work. I’m an LDS mother, but many of the kids I’ve “adopted” into my tribe as a teacher are not of my faith, and I’m asking you to take and apply Elder Uchtdorf’s words. Stop it. Please love “my” kids as friends for yours as much as you do those of our faith.

They are not a number to be added to our millions. They are not a problem to be solved. They are children of God who deserve to be loved, befriended, and accepted in their beliefs as much as your own children do.

And because I can’t end a blog post without something pulled from one of my fandoms, I’ll leave you with the quote from Yoda, one that I feel applies to all of us: “Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter.”

[meowsaidmayaanime]

Summer Simulcasts of 2016

Oh man there are so many anime this season that I can't wait to see more of!! I'm super excited!

Cheer Boys!!

I JUST watched the first episode and i'm already really into it. It's about two University boys who quite Judo Club to start an all-men's cheer leading team. I'm starting to get really into sports anime. I hope this one will be lots of fun!

Final Thoughts: This ended nicely, the focus was much more on the team dynamic and relationships than it was on the sport though. For a sports anime, we saw very little of the actual performances, which was disappointing since I love watching the animation for the cheer routines. But otherwise its a good story about college kids finding and developing themselves through cheerleading.

D.Gray Man : Hallow

I cannot express how excited I am for season 5. I LOVE this anime, and after 8 whole years we are finally getting new episodes!!! I just watched the first episode of Hallow and wow everything looks amazing. I'm just worried because now the anime is moving closer and closer to where the manga left off. I wonder if the animators will need to finish with a non-canonical ending considering the woman who writes the manga has not been releasing new chapters...

Final Thoughts: Wow, this season really caught up on a LOT of content from the manga, all the way up to when Allen visits the family who cared for him as a child. There is definitely going to be more considering they didn't make up any endings or new content, the only question is when??????? Definitely worth the watch if you a D.Gray Man fan.

The Morose Mononokean

Watched the first episode and so far this looks like it'll be pretty fun. It's and exorcist anime and we all know how I tend to love my exorcist anime!!

Final Thoughts: I was sadly disappointed in how the series decided to end. It's really sweet, but I think it was just too sweet for me. The content was too light, as in it felt like it was oriented more for a younger/child audience rather than a teenage one like the cast. I'm not sure if there will ever be a second season considering how many loose ends are left. I can't in good faith recommend this, it wasn't bad, it just isn't suited for older audiences.

Bananya

This is ridiculously adorable. A series of 3 minute episodes showing the lives of cats who live....in bananas! Judging by the narration, I think its target are young children. Which isn't a bad thing, it just means that they wont get too in depth about the plot.

The Highschool Life of a Fudanshi

I found another really short anime at only 3 minutes per episode, but I wish it was a 10 minute episode instead. They could do a lot more with this anime.

It basically follows the daily life of a highschool boy who is really into reading gay manga. Its super cute and funny, at 3 minutes per episode you should totally give this a shot.

Sweetness and Lightning

This is a show about a single father, Kohei, who happens to meet one of his students, Kotori, from the highschool he teaches at while viewing the cherry blossoms with his young daughter. He learns that his students mother owns a restaurant and that Kotori, like him, cannot cook. From their after visiting the restaurant, Kohei promises his daughter that he will learn to make good home made meals from now on, and Kotori asks to help learn with him. I just watched the first episode and damn is this show heart warming.

Final thoughts: This show was great, 12 episodes of the heartwarming tale of a single father trying to cook for his daughter. Throughout the series we watch the father and one of his students learn the basics of cooking, giving the audience real life cooking tips and recipes. Each recipe they follow is shown step by step, and many tips for cooking are given as well. Occasionally we are shown the recipe's themselves allowing us the audience to cook the same food if we wanted to.

But underneath all the beginner cooking, the show is really about trying to connect with each other as a family. It's about the struggles we face when trying to communicate and understand our parents and children, not only between a single father and his daughter, but also between a daughter and a mother who is constantly working and constantly away.

All in all, its an incredibly sweet 'natural' slice of life. I do wish that the ending had been more well defined, but because all the episodes could be stand alone, I don't think any other way of ending it would have worked well.  If your into cooking, heartwarming, tales of growth, slice of life, you will very much enjoy this one.

Days

Another sports anime this season! About a high school boy who wants to join the soccer team but is a complete beginner. Ahhhhh this one looks so good!

Continued thoughts: Days will actually be a 24 episode anime, meaning that it will continue into the fall simulcasts. However, halfway through the series it is amazing. I love this sports anime, and would very much recommend it to anyone, even people who aren't into soccer. I will give my final thoughts later when the series has ended.

Re:ZERO -Starting Life in Another World

A very good anime, main character Subaru suddenly finds himself mysteriously transported to another world, finds himself in a few sticky situations, and manages to make new friends in the process. While trying to help the girl who saved him find her stolen insignia we learn a little more about the world we and Subaru were so rudely dropped into, and about a mysterious power that surrounds Subaru’s sudden summoning to the new world.

So far it is incredibly good, the main character is really likable and you get to watch him start to change as a person as well and many different sides to the other characters around him. I won’t say too much as I believe it would be spoiling a little bit of the anime, but it is definitely one you should give a shot.

This anime will be extending into the summer simulcasts as a full 25 episode season rather than the typical 12 episodes. So I will reserve the rest of my judgment in my Summer Simulcast list when it has finished!

Bungo Stray Dogs

This show is great. It has magical abilities, detective work, mafia, and LOTS of dark comedy. I love it! Its like a vague mix of Sherlock and Charlotte, but at times darker. The season is extending into the summer being released as a full season of episodes rather than those dumb 12 episode half seasons. So with that said, I will finish my opinion when it has ended. But for now, I highly recommend watching it!!!

Twin Star Exorcists

This anime is just weird. I have a soft spot for exorcist shows but this one is sort of all over the place. It is extending into the summer simulcasts with a full season. It starts out as being about two young exorcists in training who are revealed as the ‘twin star exorcists’. A legendary pair of exorcists who are destined to bring a miko into the world who will defeat the ‘demons’ they fight. It very quickly became a fighting, exorcist, drama, romance, action anime, which is a weird combination of genres. I’m not sure how I feel about this anime either. I supposed I’m rather ‘in the middle’ with this one, it’s not good, it’s not bad, but I want to keep watching it. It’s still amusing, just so far not something I would openly recommend to anyone… I’ll give my final opinion after its finished airing.

addendum: I have dropped this anime. I'm not sure if I will ever finish it or not, but for now I am no longer watching it, you can read more about why I dropped it here.

Re:Life

Would HIGHLY recommend. It was released IN FULL, that is all 13 episodes were released all at once. Needless to say, I've already watched the entirety of it!

And Holy crap this anime turned out vastly better than I ever expected it to. The premise is that 27 year old Kaizaki Arata is unable to get a job after he quite his first job after only 3 months of employment. Now he has become slightly recluse and very much dispirited from being constantly turned away at interviews because of this and is unable to support himself. Until an agent at this company developing the technology to make a persons appearance young again with the offer of paying for Kaizaki’s living expenses for one year while he goes back to high school using the drug in order to turn him into a productive member of society. After reading that I was intrigued but also expecting a total ‘boob-fest’. Instead the show turned out to be very real, down to earth and focuses on many social issues and the development of relationships from classmates, to coworkers, to friends, to even (a little) romance. It’s absolutely fascinating and doesn’t have the stereotypical characteristics of a high school anime. The characters are wholesome and well rounded, following their journey of self discovery and growth.

This series is also the first series on Crunchyroll to be fully released all at once. So while it is technically a 2016 summer anime, the full 13 episodes were released July 1st. Which I think is really cool. I’m sure there will be another season considering this season (from what I heard) only barely scratched the tip of the manga. It did not reach the end of the ‘1 year as a high school student’ instead this season covers only half of the school year. But despite that, the ending of the season was not rushed and came to a wonderful (temporary) close. Because it was JUST released, no one quite knows when the second season will be released or if Re:Life was confirmed for one, but hopefully we will get to see more soon.

This is an anime I would definitely recommend anyone give a chance. Simply because it is very well done. If you like character development/self-discovery, school or slice of life anime, you will love this one. It is not fast paced and does not have fan service (i’m glad), so don’t go into this expecting any of that!

10/10 would watch again. Here’s the trailer.

[thephoblographer]

All images by Michelle Groskopf. Used with permission,

Photographer Michelle Groskonpf is a fine art street photographer that shoots in a style and subject matter that you don’t really see anywhere else. The LA based artist says that she used to be a “creeper” but these days finds happiness in the small moments of intimacy. That’s very evident by her Instagram and she’s now on a mission to make her photos into a book. Michelle’s book is called Sentimental, and she likes to bill it as more of a monograph than a coffee table book. Michelle got her start in photography during some troubling times in her teenage years. And like many others, she found a way to creatively express herself through fine art photography. Her style combines street portraiture with bright flash that brings us all the details of a person’s face. Michelle believes that everyone, in their own way, is both important and urgent.

Phoblographer: Talk to us about how you got into photography.

Michelle: My early teenage years were a mess. I was bullied a lot, I was restless and would spend a lot of time skipping class reading by my locker. My grades dropped and there were threats of suspension. What do you give a young outsider to help draw them back in? To help make them present. It was my high school art teacher that turned things around for me. She taught me all about photography and film. Talked to me about my ideas and gave me a platform in which to express myself and explore the world. I’ve carried that with me ever since. I owe the direction of my life to her really. I do my best to continue the circle by teaching underprivileged kids photography through organizations like The Lucie Foundation, Youth Arts and EduCare. Photography as an artistic pursuit is a powerful tool for engaging the world and the self.

Phoblographer: What made you want to get into street photography?

Michelle: I shot a lot of work in NY without telling anyone. NY is such a judgmental place that my private photography practice gave me a break from the rest of my life. It was something I did just for me. All those years of shooting without really sharing allowed me to develop a discipline and my approach and style without outside influence. I feel very fortunate for having had that period of growth and privacy. Now of course I tend to overshare! Ha. But those early years were crucial to building my love for shooting in the street.

“I was a creeper initially and would push myself to seek and find small stories developing on the street.”

Phoblographer: Your work seems to draw influence from Bruce Gilden in some ways and it seems like you even use his style of working except that you’re mostly acting with consent. Can you talk to us about your influences?

Michelle: I studied filmmaking for a large chunk of my life and then went on to produce and work as a graduate film production professor in NY. Film was my introduction to image making, not photography. I’m completely self taught and spent very little time learning about the history of photography. Bruce would be very upset to hear that! He stresses the importance of knowing the craft through your place in it. I disagree. I’m more like a wild animal in that I believe in order to truly express yourself you need to ignore traditional influences. My aesthetic comes from early cinematography, especially Orson Welles’ use of camera to build caricature and personality. I loved the early screwball comedies and the masterful work of Billy Wilder and Ernst Lubitsch. I also credit my family and my suburban Jewish upbringing for building my language. Big hair, big nails, colors, teenagedom and awkwardness.

There is a ton of crossover in life and work. People tend to speak the same language as others and that’s a beautiful thing. At some point in my life I chose to get close and explore the hugeness of details and faces, as there have been others and will be more to come. It’s an impulse we share. Just like other photographers grab at the bigger picture. Everyone brings a little something something to the table. I love Bruce. I’ve had the pleasure of spending some time with him. He’s the nicest guy and a true master. Uncle Bruce.

Phoblographer: Why is a flash so important to your street photography?

Michelle: Flash is my chunky paintbrush and brushstroke. It’s me declaring that there is obviously a photographer here interpreting this moment. It’s me in the act of creating. It’s a beautiful tool that allows me to make a star out of a hand, which is very deserving of a hand in my opinion. There is an earnestness that floods the frame when you shoot without flash. A seriousness of tone. I’m not an earnest person. It also changes the way I work. I don’t much like creeping or hiding. Flash doesn’t allow you to hide. There are consequences for good or bad to each shot. It keeps me in line and thinking about why I am doing what I am doing.

Phoblographer: How do you think your style has fundamentally evolved since you started shooting?

Michelle: I was a creeper initially and would push myself to seek and find small stories developing on the street. I did that for years and years. I was a real ninja but honestly it felt a bit impersonal for me. So my main evolution has been in moving significantly closer, shifting from context to detail. When I moved to LA from NY it triggered a wave of sentimental nostalgia for me. It reminded me very fundamentally of my suburban childhood. The more I looked around the more it tugged on my heartstrings and brought back these acute memories. I ended up using my camera as a device to frame the things that triggered memory. That’s what Sentimental is about. That’s what flows through all of my recent work from the last 5 years.

“Bruce would be very upset to hear that! He stresses the importance of knowing the craft through your place in it. I disagree. I’m more like a wild animal in that I believe in order to truly express yourself you need to ignore traditional influences.”

I don’t always think of myself as a photographer. I use photography to explore ideas but I’m sure if I could paint I would do that too. I also love to write and I played the drums for most of my life so the tool has only ever been the tool. I’m more interested in the idea behind it all.

Phoblographer: What do you feel typically attracts you to the people that you photograph? Have you noticed those patterns in your work at all?

Michelle: It’s all guts and intuition. These people and details attract me. They make me feel strongly so like a perfumer I want to bottle it up and share it and think about it. It’s definitely a compulsion for me. That’s why I shoot so much. I feel drawn to these people and I have to photograph them. It’s that simple. The themes that run through my work make up my life. They are a visual representation of how I see and what I am interested in. It’s a diary but catalogued through strangers.

Phoblographer: Do you feel like these people have some sort of genuine, urgent importance at all or do you feel like they’re more part of your creative vision and in some way are just collaborators in your orchestra?

Michelle: Everyone is urgently important. All of us. That’s the joy of doing this. We don’t always see the value in our everyday lives, only the big important moments, the overtures. But I think we live in the details. The moment I started getting closer and using flash was the moment I gave in to being open to momentary intimacy between strangers. That’s very hard for me. And often for the people I photograph. I get yelled at a lot. Not everyone wants to be exposed to that kind of vulnerability. I get that for sure. The larger truth for me is that in the end the photographs say way more about me then the people in the frame. It’s a rather intense cataloguing of my likes and dislikes and rapid thought process as I go about my business of the day.

Phoblographer: How do you think that a street photographer’s work differs when they interact with a subject vs simply shooting off candids? How do you think that the entire mentality of the moment changes?

Michelle: Girl don’t get me started! This goes out to all those obsessed with candid in street. I hate rules. I recognize the importance of them much like training wheels are important to kids learning to ride but they should never define the work. If you are out there using the street as your blank page you are participating in the history of street photography. I’d rather see wildly inventive original work any day than stale impersonal work made by rule pushers. I also think there is something profound in talking to strangers who you may never have had the opportunity to engage with otherwise. What a gift. That’s the mess of life. Bumping into each other. Sometimes I talk to people, sometimes I grab it and walk off, often I grab it, talk a bit, grab it again. I get yelled at and questioned and on a good day I’m flying through it and everyone is smiling or flattered or into it. As long as the work is good and clear and says something to at least me. There is no such thing as untainted photography. We are all making choices and framing things. There is no such thing as real or candid photography. Only choices. Do what you need to do, to say what you have to say. Just do it with respect and kindness. That’s my rule.

Phoblographer: So now you’re in the process of making a book of all your work. Tell us a bit about it. Of course, it’s a coffee table book but what makes your work stand out that much more than other photographers’?

Michelle: The book is called Sentimental and is being published by the incredibly supportive Magenta Foundation. They gave me a show several years ago and we’ve been planning this monograph ever since. It will be my first book and I’m very excited about it. This book is my way of tunneling back to my childhood and early adulthood through modern day Los Angeles. It’s a feeling and a sentiment and I’m very excited to share it with everyone. The imagery is a lot of fun.

I think of my work as a separate world. The best compliment has always been “I saw a photo and right away I knew it was yours” or “I saw a Michelle Groskopf person today”. My photographs have a specific vibe and feeling and if you don’t get it now you will once you spend time with the book. It clearly invites you into my weirdo world. I’m also excited to see my photographs large and as tactile objects. I showcase my work on social media a ton but the photos work very well large. You’re really there with these people and are given time to meditate on the details. It’s the best way to experience my work. So please help make this a reality and sponsor my kickstarter!

Phoblographer: Talk to us a bit about the gear that you use?

Michelle: I use a popular mirrorless brand of camera but these days I think any camera will do the trick. I have a ton of flashes. I love Godox/Flashpoint and Cactus. They have both done a lot in bringing well priced strobes to mirrorless cameras. I’m looking to buy a Pentax 67 for a special project I’m gearing up for and to use in my studio. Film on the street doesn’t make sense for my street work because it’s too slow, expensive and I shoot too damn much, but it makes perfect sense for experimenting in my studio or for specific commercial or documentary projects.

Phoblographer: Where do you see your career in a year and how do you see yourself getting there?

Michelle: I hope to explore galleries over the next year once my book is released. A solo show is the next step for me. I just left my representation and am looking to partner with a great agency who sees the potential for my work in the commercial world. I love playing with teen culture, subcultures and fashion so it seems a natural fit.

I recently opened a small photo studio in Hollywood with my partner Sasha Tivetsky. It’s called Rad Place. I want to see what will happen when I bring my outside people indoors. Experimentation really excites me. And of course I also think about getting back to the moving image so video is definitely on the horizon. Skies the limit really. For now I’m looking to get this book made so please visit my Kickstarter and preorder your copy!

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"I was a creeper initially and would push myself to seek and find small stories developing on the street." All images by Michelle Groskopf. Used with permission, Photographer Michelle Groskonpf is a fine art street photographer that shoots in a style and subject matter that you don't really see anywhere else.

[spanishforfunraleigh]

Assessing Your Child’s Friends – How To Handle A Sensitive Issue

There are many wise sayings related to friends, the company we keep, and the effect their presence and influence has on us. As a parent, you may be wondering how to manage the impact — both positive and negative — of your child’s friends, especially when he or she reaches school-going age and peers become a significant social force. It is important to know when to simply advise your child and when to take more action. The following post takes a closer look at these choices:

Parents: Should You Choose Your Child’s Friends?

Remember that moment when you held your baby for the first time. Along with suddenly turning into a parent, you were smacked with the responsibility of another human being. You chose between cloth and disposable diapers, between breastfeeding and formula, between steel and BPA free plastic…at every stage of that little person’s life – you made a choice.

Thinking about peer influence

This rang in my ears especially loudly when this past week my four year old said a bad word. I did a double take and asked him what he said. He just shrugged and repeated his sentence like it was nothing out of the ordinary. Hit with the word again, I asked him if he knew what he was saying was wrong and a bad word. He shrugged again and said A (his best friend at school) says it all the time. Read more at Kids Stop Press…

When you believe your child’s behavior is being negatively influenced by their friends, you need to address it immediately. As someone wisely observed: “What you do not correct you affirm.”

How can you tell if your child has a bad friend? Or if someone around them is a bad influence? How can you make the best judgment about your child’s friends? These are all important questions, which the following post examines:

What’s a parent to do if your child is hanging out with kids you don’t approve of, whose values and upbringing don’t match your own? You want to give him the freedom to choose his friends, without throwing his values, morals and convictions out of the window. It’s a tough dilemma that you’re bound to face, sooner or later.

Here are some tips for navigating the road ahead.

#1 Don’t judge a book by its cover

Get to know your child’s friend. Don’t base your judgment on first impressions. He might seem rowdy and violent, but that could be more a sign of a high energy personality and boredom than an innate desire to wreak havoc or cause bodily harm. She might talk a lot about boys, not because she’s into them (at the tender age of four) but because her teenage big sister is always talking about her latest crush. Conversely, kids who appear clean and innocent may be masking inner turmoil and deep-rooted issues. Read more at The New Age Parent…

One of the best ways to evaluate the character and quality of your child’s friends is to invite them to visit your home. Close interactions will help you assess the peers your son or daughter is hanging out with. You will then be in a better position to make informed decisions about the friendship.

To keep from focusing on the negative, you should acquaint yourself with what a good friend for your child will look like. Here is one mother’s helpful description:

What Makes a Good Friend — 10 Signs Your Child’s Friend is a Good Influence

After my daughter Chloe went through a particularly difficult friendship with a girl who turned out to be a bully, I’ve thought a lot about what makes a good friend for my children. I am so thankful for the friends who have been good influences in my children’s lives. I’m not just grateful for the friendship, I’m grateful for the examples they have set and the way they help my daughters to be their best selves.

I’ve found that the signs that your child has a good friend are often the exact opposite of the signs that a friend might be a bully or a person who ends up bringing your child down. Read more at Overstuffed Life…

Clearly, it is important for your child to be surrounded by the right influences from an early age. It is not hyperbole to state that enrollment in a great preschool can set your child on a path that leads to life-long success.

At Spanish for fun!, our innovative immersion program teaches children to speak Spanish and appreciate the culture. We strive to instill the values of empathy and multiculturism in our students. We provide them with a global understanding of life and promote holistic development of both their cognitive and social skills.

If you are in Raleigh and looking for a preschool that will offer your child the benefits discussed in this post, Spanish for fun! is your best option. We combine the loving care that your child needs with Spanish language education, cultural learning and lots of fun.

Get in touch with us today to schedule a tour of our Raleigh campus. Call 919-881-1160 or complete the form on our website. We look forward to showing you why your child will thrive with us.

The post Assessing Your Child’s Friends – How To Handle A Sensitive Issue appeared first on Spanish for fun! Daycare Preschool Raleigh NC.